Navigating the Holiday Season: Managing Trauma Triggers During a Stressful Time

For many, the upcoming holiday season is a time of joy, connection, and celebration. But for those with trauma histories, it can be a particularly challenging time. The holidays often come with heightened stressors, reminders of difficult experiences, and changes in routine - all of which can trigger trauma responses. Understanding why the holiday season can be difficult and knowing how to manage these challenges can help you approach this time with more ease and self-compassion.

Why the Holidays Can Be Triggering for Trauma Survivors

1. Family Gatherings and Social Expectations:

The holidays often come with expectations to spend time with family and friends. For those who have experienced trauma within family relationships, these gatherings can bring up painful memories or put them back into difficult dynamics. Even well meaning conversations can touch on sensitive topics, leading to feelings of anxiety or distress. The pressure to be "merry", "grateful", and expected to be spending time with a present family can add to this, leaving many feeling isolated in their experiences.

2. Memories of Loss or Grief: The holiday season can be a poignant reminder of those we've lost, whether through death, estrangement, or other circumstances. This can be especially triggering for those who have experienced trauma related to loss, such as the death of a loved one or the end of an important relationship. The absence of someone who was once a central part of holiday traditions can heighten feelings of grief and loneliness.

3. Financial and Emotional Stress: Financial strain is common during the holiday season, with many feeling pressured to buy gifts, host gatherings, travel, or place of income shutting down for a period of time. This stress can be triggering, particularly for those who have a history of trauma related to poverty, neglect, or financial instability. Additionally, the overall busyness or eerie nothingness of the season can make it harder to engage in self-care, increasing the likelihood of feeling overwhelmed.

4. Disruption of Routine: For those managing trauma, having a consistent routine can be a vital part of feeling safe and grounded. During the holidays, routines often change, whether due to travel, social commitments, or time off from work. This disruption can be unsettling and trigger a sense of losing control or safety.

Tips for Managing Trauma Triggers During the Holiday Season

If you find yourself feeling anxious, overwhelmed, or triggered during the holiday season, you’re not alone. Here are some strategies to help you navigate this time with greater resilience:

1. Set Boundaries That Prioritize Your Wellbeing: You have the right to set boundaries around who you spend time with and how much time you spend in social settings. If certain gatherings feel too overwhelming, it’s okay to decline invitations or leave early if you need to. Consider setting time limits for events, planning breaks during gatherings, having an exit strategy if you feel uncomfortable, and plan your self care.

2. Create Your Own Traditions: If traditional celebrations bring up painful memories or don’t align with your current needs, consider creating new traditions that feel more meaningful to you. This could be something as simple as a quiet evening with a good book, watching your favourite movies, cooking a flavourful meal, volunteering, or spending time in nature or with pets. Establishing new rituals can help you reclaim the season in a way that feels safe and comforting.

3. Practice Grounding Techniques: Grounding techniques can be especially helpful when you feel triggered or overwhelmed. Techniques like deep breathing, the 5-4-3-2-1 sensory exercise (naming five things you see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste), or holding a comforting object can help you stay present and connected to the here and now.

4. Make Time for Self-Care: During the holiday rush, it’s easy to neglect self-care. Prioritizing activities that nurture your wellbeing is essential. This could include taking time for a short walk, practicing mindfulness or meditation, journaling, or spending time with a pet. Even small acts of self-care can help you feel more self love, grounded and resilient.

5. Reach Out for Support: It’s okay to seek support during the holiday season. This might mean connecting with trusted friends or family members who understand your experience, reaching out to a support line, or staying connected to your therapist. A supportive person can provide a listening ear and help you navigate difficult moments. If you’re feeling particularly overwhelmed, don’t hesitate to connect with crisis support services.

6. Manage Expectations and Give Yourself Permission to Feel: The holidays are often portrayed as a time of joy and togetherness, which can create pressure to feel happy even when you don’t. It’s important to remind yourself that it’s okay to have mixed feelings or even to feel sad during this time. Allow yourself to acknowledge your feelings without judgment and remember that you don’t have to live up to anyone’s expectations.

You Are Not Alone

Navigating the holiday season with trauma can be challenging, but remember, you don’t have to go through it alone. At Core Trauma Therapy, we are here to provide a compassionate and safe space for you to process your feelings and find the support you need. Whether you’re struggling with past memories, family dynamics, or the overall stress of the season, our goal is to help you feel heard, understood, and empowered to care for yourself.

Reach out to us today to learn more about how we can support you through this period of time. Remember, it’s okay to put yourself first this holiday season, and to take the steps you need to protect your wellbeing.